Being overweight is not easy, and it really isn't a choice. You don't wake up one morning and say I think I am going to become morbidly obese. It happens, slowly and over time. It creeps up on you, first you are fat, then you are obese, and then you are morbidly obese. And all the whil you don't stop to think this is a choice.
People look at you and they think it is. You chose to overeat, you chose those donuts, you made a conscious decision of what went into your mouth. And yes that is all true. But you did not choose to be obese.
It happens, and you don't like that it happens, but once it happens you are like a deer in the headlights. You are blinded, stuck, lost. And the idea of losing 100, 200 and even 300 pounds seems unattainable. You look at people who say that they are trying to lose 10/20 pounds and you are saying to yourself "if only".
You try to diet, at a loss what to eat, how to feed your ever growing hunger. The body screams no I need more I can't survive on a mere 1200 calories, so you up it to 1500-2000, and find you are not losing weight. But maybe you are not eating 1500-2000 calories, maybe you are eating more. You don't know. You look up the calories, but the calories are for a single serving, are you having a single serving. Probably not. So maybe that 1200 calories was really 1500-2000 and the 1500-2000 is really 2500-3000.
You realize that this might be the problem, so you weigh your food, you carefully portion out exactly how much you can eat and you follow the plan for a week, month, couple of months. You are constantly hungry, angry, feel it isn't fair and you lose 5/10 pounds in those two months. Everyone tells you those 5/10 pounds are great, but you calculate in your head how long it will take you to lose the weight at losing 1 to 2 pounds a week. For someone who needs to lose 200 pounds it is going to take over two years. And all the while you are thinking when I am done dieting...
Then you think, I just don't give a damn, I don't care that I am fat, I am fine with the way I am, I just won't go out in the world and then I won't have to worry about it. This works until you have sated yourself and then you think what have I done? How could I do this? I was doing so good. I failed, and the cycle starts anew.
No it isn't a choice it is a battle, and it is a battle usually lost.
People look at you and they think it is. You chose to overeat, you chose those donuts, you made a conscious decision of what went into your mouth. And yes that is all true. But you did not choose to be obese.
It happens, and you don't like that it happens, but once it happens you are like a deer in the headlights. You are blinded, stuck, lost. And the idea of losing 100, 200 and even 300 pounds seems unattainable. You look at people who say that they are trying to lose 10/20 pounds and you are saying to yourself "if only".
You try to diet, at a loss what to eat, how to feed your ever growing hunger. The body screams no I need more I can't survive on a mere 1200 calories, so you up it to 1500-2000, and find you are not losing weight. But maybe you are not eating 1500-2000 calories, maybe you are eating more. You don't know. You look up the calories, but the calories are for a single serving, are you having a single serving. Probably not. So maybe that 1200 calories was really 1500-2000 and the 1500-2000 is really 2500-3000.
You realize that this might be the problem, so you weigh your food, you carefully portion out exactly how much you can eat and you follow the plan for a week, month, couple of months. You are constantly hungry, angry, feel it isn't fair and you lose 5/10 pounds in those two months. Everyone tells you those 5/10 pounds are great, but you calculate in your head how long it will take you to lose the weight at losing 1 to 2 pounds a week. For someone who needs to lose 200 pounds it is going to take over two years. And all the while you are thinking when I am done dieting...
Then you think, I just don't give a damn, I don't care that I am fat, I am fine with the way I am, I just won't go out in the world and then I won't have to worry about it. This works until you have sated yourself and then you think what have I done? How could I do this? I was doing so good. I failed, and the cycle starts anew.
No it isn't a choice it is a battle, and it is a battle usually lost.
T3 - you've got more will AND "won't" power than anyone I know. Hopefully your resolve will spillover to your easily led spouse. Go T3
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of the conversation we had about smoking once. Trying to lose weight is similar in some respects to trying to stop smoking, but there are major differences too. For example, as you said, you have to eat to live. The psychology is definitely interesting. The process in both cases is incredibly difficult.
ReplyDelete